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Post by jessimyre on Nov 14, 2007 23:32:01 GMT -5
No plot, no character thread. Just jump in and RPG!
... The Discworld, a flat(ish), well OK there's hills and mountains... well alright it isn't flat at ALL but it is a disc and it is flatter than say, those boring round planets with axis and science and all those people in white coats who take the joy out of everything.
The Discworld floats through space, carried on the back of four giant elephants which in turn stand on the back of the Great A'Tuin. A sea turtle so large that one eye could be a supernova. Occasionally an elephant needs to cock a leg to allow the sun to go past. Once, the moon did get stuck which caused all SORTS of problems to do with seasons and tides which took the UU a very long time to sort out but nobody likes to talk about that sort of thing, it looks bad for tourism.
Ankh-Morpork, the twin city and incidentally the largest city on the disc is a bustling cess-pit of life. Occasionally nasty bits float to the surface. And it stinks.
Looking down from a great height one might fancy the city looks rather like an onion, cut in half. Lots of rings which stem from the old city walls which as the city grew over the centuries, had been rebuilt several times.
Nobody bothers any more. Why have walls and gates? There is no need to fear invaders - not when you could sell them things, trade their coins and steal it all back later.
As the meaphorical watcher scans the city which is steadily getting closer by way of a clever cinematic effect, one would see the Unseen University, the Guild of Assassins, the Plaza of Broken Moons, the Patrician's Palace, the Opera House and possibly the freshly rebuilt Post Office. As the ground gets closer, the eye of the beholder is plunged suddenly into a side street somewhere near the edge of the shades.
...
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Post by jessimyre on Nov 14, 2007 23:37:30 GMT -5
Where Kyliee Brampton had just been fired. The girl was turfed out of her master's house and the door firmly slammed behind her. A moment later it opens just wide enough for a face to look out and Kyliee turned hopefully. Her pitiful bag of belongings was dumped in her outstretched hands and the door slammed again.
Kyliee looked round at the couple of people hurrying past in the very narrow street and swore.
"Bugger."
That was all there was to be said, really. She settled her little bag over her shoulder and strode out. It didn't do to loiter in the Shades, even with her skills. Perhaps it was time for something new.
She wondered if any of the nobs up on Liliac Avenue wanted a maid. Or a Nanny. Or anything at all, really.
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Post by blossom on Nov 15, 2007 12:30:33 GMT -5
Loving it ...
Arianrhod Carding was bored. Which wasn't that unusual, if she was honest, except that what she was bored of was being bored. It turned out that even boredom got repetitive after a while. She leant against the wall in the crowded, smoky room, and didn't pay much attention when a shadow glided in and a sinister figure sat down at the bar. There was nothing very remarkable about sinister figures in this place. The Drum zealously guarded its reputation as the most fashionably disreputable tavern in Ankh-Morpork, and for that reason the large troll that guarded the door now carefully screened the clientel for suitability in the way of black cloaks, magic swords, glowing eyes and so forth. Roddy had once asked her boss, the tavern's proprietor, what he did to the failures. Apparantly he ate them.
When the figure lowered its hood, it turned out to be a thin, scrawny adolescent in glittering black robes and a matching hat. Roddy almost felt disappointed; it would have been nice to have someone mildly interesting for once, but as usual she was faced with a greasy-haired, acne riddled teenage wizard who, after trying ineptly to flirt with her for a few hours, would have to go off and have a cold shower and a lie down.
The subject of wizards and sex was a complicated one, but Roddy had discovered that in essence it boiled down to this: when it comes to wine, women and song, wizards are allowed to get drunk and croon as much as they like.
She used to find fun in timing how long it took the young wizards to get so flustered they had to stumble back to the Unseen University, but it had, of course, gotten slightly stale. Nothing was really fun anymore.
It was a bit of a bugger really.
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Post by jessimyre on Nov 15, 2007 19:11:08 GMT -5
Kyliee's feet took her along a cobbled street. Evening in Ankh-Morpork was another excuse to trade to those who were out and about. Beggars begged, theives theived, assassins assassinated... and Cut-Me-Own-Throat Dibbler was out attempting to get his latest project off the ground.
"Muffin, miss?"
Kyliee looked at the cow-pat shaped bakery item with deep suspicion. "What's wrong with it?" The muffin sat, menacing. She swore she'd seen it twitch.
"Nothing!" Dibbler enthused, "It is the latest in Imp-made confectionary. Its a new line I'm starting. These muffins are the lightest, sweetest things you'll ever taste. I also have donuts, chocolate slices, apple turnovers and rock cakes! Tell you what, half price for you, miss to be the first to try them. Cutting my own throat here. What do you say?" the man's eyes glinted. It was true, the sausage-onna-stick wasn't really doing well lately and Dibbler's manic expression reflected that.
The rock cakes looked just like rocks.
"Er, no thanks. I'm on a diet." Kyliee answered and looking for an excuse to get away spotted the Troll on the door of what was affectionately known as 'The Drum', Ankh-Morpork's... exlusively different pub. "I've got to go, meeting someone." she muttered and hurried away before Dibbler could detain her further.
"Evenin', Krys." she nodded to the Troll. The great craglike creature looked at her briefly, recognised her face and nodded in return. He shuffled back into, what Kyliee liked to think of as, his waiting-orders position. He looked like a rock in which somebody could pick out facial features in the right light and with a bit of imagination.
The bar was fairly quiet. It was early yet. A hairy hand reached around the door as she entered and grabbed her wrist. Kyliee looked round without surprise.
"Evenin' Morey." she said. The bogeyman released her and with a gesture answered. "Evening, Kyliee. Would you be so good as to let Igor know I need another, same as usual."
"Certainly." she answered and wend her way to the bar between tables and stools. Igor was at the bar, wiping grease around his glasses with a practised ease. Of course, he wasn't a real Igor, but felt that the name gave him a certain air. The real Igor's coming into Ankh-Morpork these days avoided the bar like the plague. They felt he was cheating.
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Post by blossom on Nov 16, 2007 13:03:13 GMT -5
Roddy served the pimple-ridden young wizard his drink to a round of stuttering, embarrased compliments. If she knew anything, she'd bet he'd gotten them from the cook at Unseen University - they would have mortally offended a hag. A closer inspection of the boy had also got her wondering if perhaps somewhere in his ancestry he was related to a stick insect. He was all arms and legs and bones and no fat or muscle. Or maybe he was related to Death - the wizards all said He was a complete skeleton.
As she pondered the gangly adolescent's lineage, another shadow swooped in and sat down at the bar. Like Pimply, it was wearing a large black cloak, but unlike Pimply it didn't lower its hood. Instead, when it spoke its voice was muffled by the black fur lining.
"Psst."
"Not yet," a man further up the bar slurred drunkenly, "But I'm working on it." Catching Igor's gaze, Roddy raised an eyebrow, but the greasy barman shook his head. It meant the man would be buying more beer.
"I'm looking for someone," the hooded shadow continued as if there had been no interruption.
"Anyone in particular?" Roddy asked warily. People could get into trouble this way.
"Someone who wouldn't mind taking risks for high reward."
"Ah. That narrows it down a bit, I'm afraid," Roddy said, "Would this involve a perilous journey into unknown and likely dangerous lands?"
"It would."
"Encounters with exotic creatures?"
"Could be."
"Facing almost certain death?"
"Almost certaintly."
"Well, I wish you every luck in your search but I don't know anyone round here like that," Roddy said, seeing the Librarian signalling for her down at the other end of the bar.
"What?"
"Most of the fellows who come in here are all show and no bite," she shrugged. "Bloody cowards, the lot of them. But each to their own, and I'm meant to be working the bar."
She gave the rather shocked hood a friendly nod, and ambled on down to where the Librarian was waiting.
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Post by twilightblade on Nov 16, 2007 14:53:40 GMT -5
{oooh, could I jump in as the Librarian?}
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Post by blossom on Nov 16, 2007 15:33:57 GMT -5
{go for it! .... as long as you're aware the Librarian's an orang-utan, LOL}
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Post by twilightblade on Nov 17, 2007 15:07:36 GMT -5
[yeah, I've read disc-world  ...Hmmm, but it's been a-while. I don't remember if he talks or not...] "Oough!" The Libarian demanded his usual drink. |
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Post by jessimyre on Nov 17, 2007 16:58:13 GMT -5
(I think you'll find he speaks in a series of Ooks LOL)
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Post by Kage Chaos on Nov 19, 2007 13:18:48 GMT -5
Kage...is confused. 
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Post by blossom on Nov 20, 2007 11:33:49 GMT -5
[Lol, what's confusing you?]
"Oough!" The Librarian didn't even wait for her to ask the customary "What can I get you?" as she approached.
"One banana-tini coming right up," Roddy said, rolling her eyes. She held up a hand before the Librarian could say anything else, "I know. Easy on the tini."
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Post by Kage Chaos on Nov 20, 2007 13:56:51 GMT -5
lol I don't know a thing about Discworld.
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Post by twilightblade on Nov 20, 2007 19:42:29 GMT -5
The Librarian touched its throat gingerly with a long forefinger, then tried again. "Ooook!"
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Post by jessimyre on Dec 10, 2007 21:28:51 GMT -5
Kyliee approached the bar, shouldering her way between shadowy customers. A dark hooded figure stalked away disgruntled and muttering away under its breath.
Another figure in a cloak and hood accidentally knocked her as it passed.
"Ow." Kyliee rubbed her arm, the stranger was hard.
DREADFULLY SORRY the figure applologised, WILL YOU BE NEEDING ASSISTANCE?
"Er," Kyliee answered, there was something odd about this one even for the Drum. "No I'm fine thankyou." she answered, confused. "I'll see you around."
YES, the figure answered as it moved away and headed out the door, IN FIFTY THREE YEARS, SIXTY FIVE DAYS, FOUR HOURS AND TWENTY MINUTES
Kyliee felt as though she had just woken up as the reality of the room came back. She must have been daydreaming. She looked up to catch the eye of Igor who was carefully giving his glasses a greasy sheen by means of a greasy rag.
"G'day, Igor." She said across the bar-room noise, "Same as usual thanks, and another Strawberry Daquaire for Morey."
Kyliee's accent differed from the rest of the bar's patrons. She was from Fourecks and had taken the opportunity to sail when the Wizards had come over after that rain business. She wanted to make her fortune, see the world. What she hadn't expected was the cold, and the rain. It rained everywhere! It was getting old, to tell you the truth and she was beginning to miss the excitement of home.
She noticed a new bar girl and wondered how long she'd been here. Kyliee couldn't remember seeing her before.
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...Hmmm, but it's been a-while. I don't remember if he talks or not...]
